Ninjago Pilot Part 1: Way of the Ninja
Some of my friends really love the Ninjago series. The newer seasons, at least. I'll be honest, I started the show a while ago and got something like three seasons in, and I was just starting to see the appeal, but then I stopped watching and now I've forgotten basically everything that happened. However, my running commentaries inevitably received positive responses from everyone I sent them to, so I figured if I have to watch the truly terrible early seasons of this show again ... someone might as well get some entertainment out of it. Enjoy.
We begin:
An old man with a beard gazes into the distance. Huh. I wonder if he's going to be important?
Is this guy a professional blacksmith? How does he make enough money to live?
Kai's so nice.
Oh, now you remember what customer service--nope, customer's gone. Good work, Kai.
The skeletons are in a monster truck. That is exactly what I expected based on the first minute and a half of solidly medieval Japanese material.
If Kai's as good at fighting with that massive sword as he is at making them, they're all gonna die.
Speaking of which, he didn't make that sword, did he? If so, they're really all gonna die.
This animation is fantastic.
Ooh girl power. Honestly, I think Nya's doing better with a staff than Kai is with a sword.
General Grievous, is that you?
Golden tornado! Again, quality animation. Nice to know the old guy's a badass, though. I can always appreciate an old badass.
Lord Garmadon ... so ominous. It's like they're foreshadowing a major villain or something.
Kai, why are you putting your sister's kidnapping on the old guy? You're theoretically in your prime (I can't really tell. He's a lego. How old is he supposed to be?) why couldn't you have done something?
"Where they go, a mortal cannot." Thank you, Yoda.
I'm with Kai. Guy's just a (terrible) blacksmith, and now his sister's kidnapped and this random old guy is talking in circles about the Underworld and Lord Garmadon and four legendary weapons?
Ooh exposition cutscene. Love it.
That story was so relevant! Literally everyone we've met so far is involved!
Training montaaaaaggggeeeee
Not ... not a training montage? Just a random scene of them climbing up to a monastery? With training montage music? Sure.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD'S TECHNOLOGY
ARE THEY IN THE MIDDLE AGES OR MODERN TIMES OR WHAT
Sorry, I'm done.
"Complete the training course before I finish my tea. Then, we will see if you are ready." *sslllluuuurrrppp* "Today you failed. Tomorrow, you will try again."
I love Sensei Wu. So much. He is sass incarnate.
Okay, now we get the training montage.
Oh no! Ninjas!
Nice that Kai ... brought his electric toothbrush with him? That Sensei Wu had an electric toothbrush for him to use? I'm sure it's fine.
YES, FIGHT THEM WITH YOUR TOOTHBRUSH, KAI
These ninjas are not very good ninjas
Whaaaaaat they're Wu's students too?
The glitter tornado has clothes changing properties!? Why didn't you say that before!?
I'm glad they're colour-coded, I might lose track otherwise.
A fear of dragons is perfectly valid, Cole, you're all good. Also, Zane's straight-faced "humour" is the best.
I trust these guys with my life. Wait, no, the other thing.
Yes Wu. Like I said, This man is the literal physical incarnation of sass.
The Caves of Despair? Sounds lovely. Like somewhere I'd go on vacation.
These skeletons are obviously just trying to earn a paycheck, you don't have to beat them up.
Kai might always be in a rush, but to be fair to him his sister did get kidnapped and then he immediately spent several weeks doing a training montage.
Good job Jay. Great work. Nice.
Oh look it's a trap. Aaaaand there are hundreds of skeletons now. Things are goin' great.
Lightning tornado! Fire tornado! Ice? Ice tornado! Dirt tornado! All the tornados!
Hmm, you know guys, I think that might be a dragon. Not sure though.
You guys are the worst ninjas ever.
Awww Kai...
Ominous evil manipulation voice ... I like where this is going.
Thank you so much for joining me on this adventure. Tune in next week when I watch the next episode, "King of Shadows." Everything's going to go so well for our heroes, I'm sure.
